Sniffles to Sobs: The Katelyn Gentry Movie Cry Continuum

In my last post, I mentioned that I cry in almost every movie ever. Though it may have seemed like an exaggeration, it's actually pretty close to true.  Now, when I say "I cried in that movie," I think some people get the impression that it's always this terrible weeping and wailing and a tiny bit of teeth-gnashing. It's only that way sometimes, though.

So, to avoid giving people the impression that I'm constantly a bundle of tears, I've decided to write a guide to my movie crying levels. Below you will find explanations of 5 different levels of crying, including descriptions of their manifestations, as well as some insight into why I cry about those things.

Level 1: The Allergy Cry. Movie scenes in this category are usually not overly sentimental or sensational in terms of the emotions they try to evoke, but I just happen to feel things--especially happiness--really strongly. Movies or movie scenes at Level 1 give me the sniffles, I have to concentrate harder on catching my breath, and I have a few tears welling up in my eyes. If I had the ability to feel embarrassed, I would probably be embarrassed that these movies made me cry.

Examples: Men in Black III, The 3 Stooges, The Muppets, How to Train Your Dragon, Joyful Noise, The Amazing Spider-man

Level 2: The eye-poke cry. This is when something is just beautiful. I can't really describe it another way. These movies feature people coming together despite their differences, cheesy ironies in love stories, etc. Pretty much any inspirational sports movie fits into this category, as do most romantic comedies. The smiling eye-poke cry is pretty self-explanatory . . . it's when I still have complete control over my face, but my eyes are watering as if I've been poked in the eye.

Examples: My Best Friend's Wedding, Serendipity, Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, Remember the Titans, The Blind Side, We Are Marshall, Miracle, Angels in the Outfield

Level 3: Just because. A lot of times I'll cry a Level 3 (several tears coming down my face, but still able to keep my eyes open) when I'm not necessarily feeling any strong emotions, but I just feel like crying to release some stress or toxins or something. Often, I'm just recalling the fact that I once felt those emotions in the movie, meaning it used to make me cry a Level 5, but now I just cry out of habit.

Examples: A Walk to Remember, The Notebook, October Sky, Mister Magorium's Wonder Emporium, I Am Sam, Walk the Line

Level 4: Beauty Queen Sobs. This one happens during sweet moments that have a tinge of bitter, or just completely sweet moments (like a parent and child relationship being repaired or strengthened), etc. This is when I'm crying a lot--meaning that I have many tears running down my face and I can't always keep my eyes open through much of it--but I can cry fairly quietly and still smile. A lot of times I'm laughing through my tears, too, which happens to be my (and Truvy Jones's) favorite emotion.

Examples: What to Expect When You're Expecting, Toy Story 3, Ramona and Beezus, People Like Us, Tangled, Steel Magnolias

Level 5: The Ugly Cry. This is pretty much reserved for movies with deaths that hit me really hard, like those of a pet, a baby/young child, or a spouse. I can't control what my face is doing or what noises come out of my mouth. I often sound like a dying whale, which perfectly complements the mascara running down my face, mingling with the snot from my nose, ending in a beautiful mess of nastiness dripping from my chin faster than I can wipe it with my hand or a tissue. See Matthew 13:42.

Examples: Charly, 17 Miracles, Bridge to Terabithia, P.S. I Love You, Marley and Me, Finding Neverland

So there you have it, my Movie Cry Continuum. Look forward to movie reviews with my cry rating on them in the coming months/years. Keep in mind, though, that depending on the day, any movie could make me cry at just about any level. I have been known to cry a Level 5+ inRemember the Titans, for example. What about you, readers? What movies make you cry?